Now That’s What I Call a Beard

Thats what you call a beard!

In honor of no-shave November – a tradition that Muslims should partake in year round – I thought it’d be fun to list the top 10 beards in sports. This list will exclude hockey players, because they have an unfair advantage when it comes to beard growing.

Thats what you call a beard!

In honor of no-shave November – a tradition that Muslims should partake in year round – I thought it’d be fun to list the top 10 beards in sports. This list will exclude hockey players, because they have an unfair advantage when it comes to beard growing. It is almost a requirement to wear a beard in the NHL, especially during playoff time, so we’ll exclude them from this list. Here are some of the great beards wearers in sports and their accomplishments:

Ortiz10. David Ortiz: A.K.A. Big Papi. Granted this beard isn’t the greatest, but I’m going off of potential here. David Ortiz has what it takes to grow out a great one, he just needs some motivation. Same can be said about his ability. He’s shown us a lot of good things, but I believe he can be much more than what he’s been giving us. He can be the greatest, just needs a little more consistence. Same goes for the beard.

Edwards9. Braylon Edwards: This is more of a recent development, but Braylon Edwards has grown one heck of a beard this season. There may be no correlation, but his productivity has grown as well. He’s known to be a player with a lot of potential, but it’s been mostly untapped. He has had one great season with the Cleveland Browns taking in 80 receptions for 1,289 yards and 16 touchdowns. But since then he has had some lack luster performances. Can the beard help him reach the top again?

Harden8. James Harden: In his second year out of Arizona State University, Harden has been a productive player off the bench. A dedicated beard wearer, he grew it in college and it seemed to be his good luck charm, getting him on a very young and talented Oklahoma team where he has found his niche as a shooter off the bench. His productivity is down a little from last season, but only 5 games into the season, a shooter like Harden can turn it around very quickly.

Lalas7. Alexi Lalas: For those football (soccer) fans, here is a retired veteran who played for the US national team. He’s now an analyst for ABC sports, but was a great player in his time and also had a few stunts as a general manager. Unfortunately he has a more cleaned up look due to his TV analyst job, but back in his playing days his beard was hard to compete with.

Faneca6. Alan Faneca: There is something about Offensive linemen that just screams mountain man. But Alan Faneca just about tops them all. Not only has he been a wall in his 13 season of play, but his beard is one that most envy. Playing 10 seasons for the Pittsburg Steelers, he is not only a great pass blocker but was one of the reasons the Steelers were so dominate in the run all these years. He’s recently trimmed down his fantastic beard, but the potential to grow another is definitely there.

Jake Plummer5. Jake Plummer: Now this was a man on a mission. Usually QB’s are known as the pretty boys of the NFL, but this man didn’t care about any of that. He loved his beard, and I must say it’s definitely one of the better ones in the NFL. Unfortunately he didn’t play so well towards the end of his career in Denver and decided abruptly to retire, but he was definitely a productive QB and if he had the right tools around him, he could lead a team deep in the playoffs. Alas for him the Superbowl was just out of reach.

Kimbo Slice4. Kimbo Slice: Personally I’m not a big fan of Kimbo, but the man definitely has a great beard. He is a mixed martial arts fighter, but is better known for his street fighting videos where he would dominate every contender imaginable. Unfortunately for him, his MMA career didn’t go as well as everyone suspected. He has fought a few no-names, washed up fighters and has gone 4-2, but his hype as an MMA fighter has slowly diminished and the UFC cut him following his loss against Matt Mitrione.

Ed Reed3. Ed Reed: Here’s a beard that’s basically been a permanent fixture on one of the greatest Safety’s to ever play the game. He’s been out all season with hip problems, and in his first game back he had two interceptions and a force fumble. If that isn’t making a presence, I don’t know what is. He’s wowed us with 8 defensive touchdowns and is a treat ever time he touches the ball. A definite Hall of Famer, his beard should also be in consideration.

Randy Moss2. Randy Moss: Here is a man that has a hard time being out down. Same goes for the beard. Sure you can call it laziness (which perfectly describes a portion of his career) but the man can grow a good one. Even Tom Brady, the highest paid player in the league, was so jealous of it that he cried like a little girl to the cough and had Moss traded off to Minnesota. Admittedly, Randy is one of the greatest receivers to play the game, but he has never truly had one 100% in a game. Maybe if he had, we’d be putting his name next to the greatest of all time Jerry Rice.

Barron Davis1. Barron Davis: Shape and fullness-wise, Davis has in my opinion the best beard in all of sports; it’s nice, square and well maintained. Now only if we could say the same about his play in recent years. Granted he has been more charitable with the ball averaging 7 assists a game, but his shot has been off lately and will need to pick it up if he has any hope of taking his team to the playoffs – as unlikely as that will be.

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  • Ali ibn Nasir


  • PinkMuslimah

    assalamu `alaykum, brother
    If possible switch consistence -> consistency. The typo wasn’t picked up by spell check because it technically isn’t misspelled. In reality, though, it is.

  • Reader

    Another good one is Brian Wilson of the San Fransisco Giants!